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Mixed Emotions and Massacred Flowers

Last night, well it was our college ball :)

Yeah, crossing out the smiley on that one because to be honest, last night was full of mixed feelings.

List of the why:

  • The actual outfit I was supposed to wear was ruined.
  • The friends who I was supposed to be with were tremendously late, and not the fashionable kind as well.
  • When said friends arrived, it actually made me even more pissed at them because the reason for them being late was stupid. Extremely stupid. I don’t care if there were additional excuses, the actual excuse for them not arriving on time was shallow.
  • I actually had a good time despite it all because I was in a table with really fun people.
  • The performances, loved them, but one performance gave me mixed feelings as well.

Sure I had a good time because I spent a great time with people I don’t normally sit with. But I was also pissed when the people who I was supposed to be with didn’t arrive on time, and strangely enough, when they did arrive, I was even more pissed, and not my usual version of “pissed off”, it was the type that makes me want to do a big scene, I seriously wanted to cause their heads to roll, and when it involves me, heads will roll. Which is the reason for the “massacred” flowers, I needed something to calm me down without hurting other people or causing a major offense, so the lovely table decoration consisting of flowers offered me its comforting sacrifice of being plucked petal by petal into oblivion.

But still, I had a good time, the people who got their awards deserve them, really do, although the ones I was supposed to be with… when they got awards, well the first one was well I was just going to give it to them on course card giving and give a light “scolding”, but apparently, they got late because person #2 decided to change their outfit last minute, making them oh-so-not-fashionably late, in fact it was already borderline rude when you think of how late they were, I could understand the others because for one, not all of the ones who were late were my friends, and another thing, the least they could have done is apologize for being late, not make a face to make it seem as if they ate something horrible or if I am just some random tag-along. If one of you idiots are reading this, yes, you guys made faces, the people behind me served as eyewitnesses.

But anyways, when they got there, I just only decided to just let them get their deserving awards. They won after all, fair and square. One may misinterpret what I am trying to say as jealousy, but it isn’t, it’s just basically me being pissed at the people who I was supposed to be with. Sure, I had a great time with the people who were at the table with me, heck I pretty much liked everything going on last night, but it wasn’t the same as it would have been if they actually did come on time instead of being horribly late.

At the end of the night though, I wanted to at least apologize for how cold I was, but unfortunately, they decided to leave early, which added more to the negative mood I felt that night. But basically I stopped caring about it when I got home.

Now I mentioned in the list that a performance that night gave me mixed emotions, yeah, seeing the guy you like dancing with another girl can do that to you, but again, I stopped caring about it when the night ended. Fun fact though, the guy and two of his friends rode with us on the way home and even then I felt my bitchiness come out, and that rarely happens with guys I like, guys I like don’t make me bitchy.

But yeah, what actually got me through the night was my old friend, A Cold Shower. As in the ice cold kind. Spending the remaining hours of that night trying to wash off all the perfume, concealer, foundation, eyeliner of different shades, and the wax in my hair felt good, and it made me think on a lot of things. That some things are just not worth crying myself over and that there are just some things I just have to get over with(This is in relation to the other night’s post as well):

  1. There isn’t just one guy out there. I just have to keep on waiting and searching.
  2. My friends who were late may be insensitive idiots to how I feel that night and the night before, but I still love them all the same, they just have to come up with a more believable and reasonable excuse.
  3. I don’t think there will be a “perfect” night for me, nor will people accept some facts about me.

I guess that is all I have to say. One thing I am certain though of, based on all this, there’s going to be some changes next term that involve a whole different perspective of myself. Oh and to the jackasses who love to piss me off, well off with your heads. Both of them.